I broke up with Dinesh two days ago, but I felt us gravitate like weeks ago. I’m adapt with the situation. There was something wrong somewhere, it’s things I can’t illustrate. We hardly see each other anymore, I guess priority changes over the seasons. I’m determined of what I want and I’ll fight for what I need. I need change and I need someone who constantly ‘wants’ to be there for me. It’s for the better. It’s about ‘me’ now, so it’s okay.
1:31 pm • 14 August 2011
I’ve been smoking heavy lately. Maybe because I am dominated by the 80’s. I’ve been watching lots of ‘Sid and Nancy’ and the ‘The Runaways’ and they fucking own. But I should really stop, it’s contagious and deadly.
1:34 pm • 11 August 2011
It’s 2.30 p.m, i just woke up and the half of my Saturday was wasted
I did not manage to sleep yesterday, and so, I did what ?
2am-3am: while waiting for my brother, to finish his phone-talk with precious girlfriend. I was singing to The Ramones ‘Baby I love you’ this whole range of 50-60 minutes, and grinning by myself like an orang gila, I was thinking of Dinesh.
3am-4am: Finally snapped from my jiwang-ness. Rapped the whole night, rapped a lot of Nicki Minaj’s songs. It was a real romp.
4am-5am: Finally, plant myself on my bed, trying so hard to conk out, was sleeping next to little brother, and he was snoring like a freight train, I should’ve just slaughter him. Minutes after, annoying bibik knock the door and I was like never before, ready like a freddie, “Finally! Food! “
5am-5.15am: Sahur. Anak solehah, biasalah. Puasa esok hari mesti, wajib.
5.15am: Call Dinesh, oh great. The ‘Teman sehati sejiwa’ is not sleeping yet. Playing PS.
5.30am: Dopey as fuck, malas lah nak solat, tidur terus lah.
6.00am: Tak boleh tidur jugak and it’s Subuh already, and I am not suppose to eat or drink anymore. Fuck it, went downstairs and made myself a chamomile tea. I HAVE to sleep, while I am at it, turned on the music channel, and the music are basically trash. So I watched, Pucca and I got really bored. But not tired.
6am-7am: Put on eyeliners and I was feeling inspired that hour. So, I did inspiring things.
7am: I wash my face, brush my teeth, put on another pyjamas, and try my luck to sleep.
7.30am-2.30pm: I slept. So here, I am and I feel so lazy today.
3:10 pm • 6 August 2011 • 1 note
Every time I think of how much I love you, I tend to get petrified.
Life has been good, of course. Let’s just pray things don’t go off-target.
1:27 am • 2 August 2011
It’s been moons since I note myself in here. So hi-ya again fellaz.
I’ve been hustling. Busy with sorts of stuff. But nothing prodigious happened. Oh, Dinesh did turned 19. 8 days ago.
From 17 till 19, wow that’s like really fast. Thomp Thomp Thomp.
12:32 am • 28 July 2011 • 2 notes
The sun illuminates your skin in the morning, birds chirping, ample rain but it was a luminous and pleasant day or maybe it was just because, you were by my side and i wish I could wake up to that everyday.
5:54 pm • 8 July 2011 • 1 note